films seen
6
average score
1.17*
nationality
status
Alive and kicking

Movies


In the Heat of the Night

1967 / 110m - USA
Crime, Thriller
2.5*/5.0*
In the Heat of the Night poster

Rollerball

1975 / 125m - USA
Sport, Action, Thriller
1.5*/5.0*
Rollerball poster

I didn't care much for the remake, but at least that one went all-in on the action. The original version is a much slower film, and that's not a good thing. The sport itself is a little iffy and not the most interesting, but at least there's a bit of fun to be had. In between lie slower and more serious segments, which completely miss the mark.

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There's a dystopian angle that the film seems hellbent on exploring, but this is just a cheesy B-flick with a silly plot. Rather than lean into that, there's a lot of conversation and bad acting that slows the film down. The action scenes aren't the greatest either, but at least time doesn't move quite as slowly when they're on. Not half as fun as it could've been.


Only You

1994 / 115m - USA
Comedy, Romance
1.0*/5.0*
Only You poster

Moonstruck

1987 / 102m - USA
Romance
1.0*/5.0*
Moonstruck poster

I had no clue what I was getting myself into, but when I noticed Cher and Cage in the opening credits I got strangely excited. Turns out I'd fooled myself immensely, this is by far one of the most irritating romcoms I've seen in a long time. If Jewison wanted this to be an exercise in being grating, he absolutely nailed it.

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How schmaltzy drama and a cast of irritating Italian-American stereotypes are to combine into a fun romcom is beyond me, but that's what Jewison attempted here. The performances are terrible, the drama is overdone, and the soundtrack is simply grotesque. Either this is the thickest pastiche I've ever laid eyes on, or it's just plain crap. I'm betting on the latter.


Jesus Christ Superstar

1973 / 108m - USA
Musical
0.5*/5.0*
Jesus Christ Superstar poster

Fiddler on the Roof

1971 / 181m - USA
Musical
0.5*/5.0*
Fiddler on the Roof poster

A famous title, and some familiar songs. Fiddler on the Roof is a certified classic, but I had no clue what the film was about, nor what I could expect. It turned out to be a pretty drab and overlong musical, a three-hour-long ordeal about a poor Jewish Russian farmer who can't seem to get rid of his daughters.

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The setting is extremely depressing, the songs are terrible and the plight of Tevye is not something I cared about (I'm just not very traditional myself). To be exposed to that for three hours was pretty unbearable, but at least it's another classic I'll never have to wonder about again. Not my cup of tea.